Everybody loves Raymond...I mean Richard

Throughout Mrs. Dalloway, we get more and more information about Richard and Peter. Originally, we see Richard solely through the perspective of Clarissa, who sort of implies he is a little bland and boring. However, once you get further in the book, you see that Richard is actually a pretty loved guy. In contrast, from the very first page of the book, we see Peter butting into Clarissa's life. Throughout the book, he is shown as sort of annoying with his interruptions. Seeing these two characters who both had/have an interest in Clarissa, I thought it would be interesting to sort of compare the two and think about why Clarissa felt like she did. This blog post is a little messy and kind of spiderwebs into topics but I thought it would be interesting to dive into the different aspects of their characters and see how that affected their relationship with Clarissa.

Peter Walsh. I feel like we can all imagine the tone behind that name when Clarissa said that on the very first page. His name carries a complicated past as well as a complicated future for them both. Throughout the book, we see Peter always butting in, such as in the garden on the first page. I think another example of him butting into her life could be when he asked her to marry him. While she said no, she now lives with these "what if?" ideas, leaving her to move on with him interrupting her thoughts with his images. For example, very early on in the book we get the line, "If he were with me now what would he say?" Throughout the book we see that Clarissa is very aware of Peter's opinion of her. For example, during her party, Woolf writes, "She could see Peter out of the tail of her eye, critiquing her, there, in that corner." While Peter had not said or done anything to imply he was currently judging her, she was hyperaware of his opinions. Again, he is intruding on her life. Additionally, I think another important layer of him interrupting her life is the fact of how well they knew each other. They have spent a lot of time together and know each other very well and he knows what to say to hurt her. One thing he said that has really stuck with her was the fact that she would make a "perfect hostess". This deeply hurt Clarissa and stayed with her through the years. I think this especially hurt Clarissa because she didn't want to feel reduced to just a wife. We can see this in the book when Clarissa is walking to get flowers and it says, "She had the oddest sense of being herself invisible, unseen; unknown; there being no more marrying, no more having of children now, but only this astonishing and rather solemn progress with the rest of them, up Bond Street, this being Mrs. Dalloway; no even Clarissa any more; this being Mrs. Richard Dalloway." I think she is very scared of just being shrunk down into a wife instead of her own unique person. Maybe her "what if?" thoughts with Peter wonder if she would feel more like her own person if she had married Peter, someone with less social expectations from others. Maybe she wouldn't feel like she had to perform to be the perfect hostess if there was no pressure to host. Overall, her relationship with Peter is very complex, and I definitely prefer Richard, yet I think the unknowing has really stayed with her and works itself into many parts of her life.

For Richard, I originally thought that he was pretty bland and just kind of a bummer part of Clarissa's life. However, as we actually got to see Richard interact with other people, I grew to like him more and more. If you were to steal my book you would see my insightful annotations about him, such as: "he is such a sweetheart." You can easily tell he really cares about her, even if he is sometimes awkward or not the best at showing it. He tried to give her a gift, which she didn't really like, so the next time he tried flowers, not realizing she had spent her morning also buying flowers. He also spent a whole walk back from town hyping himself up to tell his wife he loves her. He just seems like a somewhat awkward yet extremely kind person. Clarissa also explains that, "For in marriage a little license, a little independence there must be between people living together day in day out in the same house; which Richard gave her, and she him...But with Peter everything had to be shared; everything gone into." I think this independence is very important for Clarissa, as she feels like she is not simply his wife, but also has time to be her own person, while fulfilling the common wife duties for their social status such as hosting parties. 

Overall, her relationship with both of them is pretty complicated and confusing. I don't think there is a 'right' answer of why she feels a certain way about either of them. For Peter, I think it was a good choice not to marry him, as she seems to need the independence, however she is stuck going on wondering what her life would've been like. For Richard, while they seem to get along and she never really says anything negative about him, they don't seem to have a super strong connection. I mean, the guy gets nervous to say "I love you" to his wife. Even after writing this, I have many unanswered questions or ideas of why Clarissa felt some way about one of them, but I wanted to use this blog post to think about some ways in which her opinion's of them differed and why that might be.